So why is the name of my blog Mosaic?  Well, because I feel that is the best description of my family.  We are a lot of colorful pieces, none of them perfect, but put us together and we make a beautiful picture.  A mom, a dad, 3 daughters and a son with a score of aunts, uncles, cousins, nieces and nephews with a grandmother here and there.

Now, why am I *here* blogging?  I'm really not sure.  I was told that there are people interested in following our story, hearing about our journey to bring home another member of our family through adoption.  I'm still not convinced that anyone will actually READ this... but I figure I'd give it a shot.

Why, with 4 children, would we possibly want to adopt another?!?  Well, I guess to begin with, I've always wanted to adopt from the time I was a little girl but the timing was never right.  We had little kids and no money.  Then over the years it was never the right time.  My father's health began failing before my son was born and he passed away after a lengthy stint with hospice just before N's 1st birthday.  Then my mom passed away suddenly the week before my daughter C's first birthday.  Then we became my grandparents' caregivers as I was an only child of an only child, and their failing health and mental status kept us busy for the next handful of years until they too passed away at the ripe old ages of 92 and 93.  And that brings us to today.  We now have the ability to make our own life plans unencumbered from the needs of other family members.  We are now blessed with the freedom to take charge of our own lives without having to be tethered to one spot, and the ability to fund these decisions from savings instead of debt.   Anyway, to get back to the WHY, I guess it's because I have a heart for children in need.  We always have extra kids here playing and our own coming and going to friends' houses.  Going from 4-5 kids for us, won't be anything traumatic in and of itself... it won't change the mini-van we drive or the set-up of the bedrooms or the amount of  doctor visits or the school that the kids attend.  The atmosphere inside the home might be altered just like  two friends of your childs' that come over... one has a high energy level that keeps everything buzzing and makes you tired just watching them and the other child comes over, quiet and laid back and you never even know they are there. This is a bit of the unknown that we'll just have to wait and see.  We have a ton of girls here and nearby, so my son is often the only boy in a gaggle of girls and he is so excited to be getting a brother that can play video games with him, ride bikes or build Lego's!  Don't get me wrong, he plays with the girls, but there is only so much he can take of them when they go into boy bugging mode!

We have a boy in mind in EE that we found through an online adoption ministry specializing in children with special needs.  His needs only require a few adjustments in how we do things or modifications that are already at our house for J.  He and N should be close enough in age to be able to relate to each other without having direct competition and enough similarities and differences to make life together work well.  Was an older boy what I had always wanted?  No.  I had originally been looking at ages 3-5 with DS until I saw the write up describing this boy.  He sounded like he would fit in perfectly with our family's interests and activities.  Upon talking with my husband, neither of us felt that his age was an issue, so one hurdle over.  Then I came upon a blog from a family that was at this orphanage and had met him!  They spoke with him, played games and saw him interact with their child-to-be and others there and that put us at ease as to his age, personality and abilities.  I was obsessed.  I felt like this boy was meant to be in our family and that, even though I had never felt there was a missing piece to our family prior ... now there was!  I would send my husband blog links, email messages, photos, websites and heart felt pleadings for adoption.  I spent every night praying (something I had not done in years).  It wasn't automatic.  He had his reservations about our ability to travel this road, and even now, is cautiously optimistic.  First he agreed that there was no reason we couldn't adopt.  Then he agreed to doing a home study to "see if we qualify to adopt".  Then he agreed to committing to this child.  And here we are.  It is a process and although one portion, the actual adoption has a certain finality to it... building your family through adoption, just like birth, is an ever evolving thing... that as you bring them home, learn and grow together... no day is ever the same as the day before.  And I am looking forward to that.